The other day I needed to do some sewing repairs on a few items of clothing. Kessler sat next to me at the dining table in the downstairs family room where I always set up my sewing machine. He, basically, spent his time there playing with my pin cushions and spools of thread. At one point, I became very frustrated because the thread kept breaking and I would have to try to rethread the needle. I can't see the hole in the needle very well without some magnification like my reading glasses and I had forgotten to take them with me to the basement. I became very frustrated about having such a difficult time trying to thread the needle, and mentioned a few times that I wish I had my reading glasses. Finally, Kessler started a great conversation with me.
Kessler: Grandma, why don't you just ask me to go get your glasses for you?
Me: would you?"
Kessler: how do you ask me nicely?"
Me: Kessler, would you please go get my glasses for me?
Kessler: with what on top?"
Me: with a cherry on top
Kessler: no, with sugar on top.
Me: Kessler, would you pretty please go get my glasses for me with sugar on top?
He then jumped up from his chair and ran upstairs to fetch my glasses from the end table next to my bed. What a great guy! He taught me the same manners I've been trying to teach him while his family has been living with us for the past six months.
JOAN-ISMS
I have a few words or sayings that I've created over several years that sometimes slip out that most people don't know about. Here's an example:
While I was sewing (after Kessler brought me my glasses), the thread broke again and I got very frustrated so I said "shoot a pig and eat it too". I don't know how I came up with that phrase. I don't use curse words, so I guess this is a replacement for that. After I said that phrase, Kessler looked at me and said "Grandma, what did you say?" Cheryl had entered the room right before I said that and she and I started busting up. I repeated the phrase and Kessler kept repeating it over and over again, but sometimes he would change it to say "shoot a pig and eat it toot". Kessler is in the phase of life where potty talk is funny to him and he uses it often. Well, I guess I never should have said that phrase in front of him. Hopefully over time, he will forget I ever said it.
Other Joan-isms and their definitions:
Goober hands - when my hands are too dirty to do something for them, I tell them that I have goober hands and can't do it.
Snitzelfritz - I use this term as a term of endearment. When someone is being silly or being a little naughty, I call them a Snitzelfritz.
Bevis - I use this term when I'm frustrated and want to swear, but don't want to use a swear word.
Stupidity on steroids - My frustration and judgementalism is alive and well when I use this phrase. When I see others do something very dumb (especially while driving) I will use this phrase. I wonder what phrases others use regarding my driving that I'm not aware of.
There you have it. I know I'm a little strange, but that's ok. We all have our idiosyncrasies, right?
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